The Connecticut Fiction Festival was a blast! The Connecticut chapter of RWA is definitely one of my favorites, and the conference went practically perfectly for me :). I learned a lot, and laughed a lot, which is important. I had a few epiphanies about my writing life, which is great. I feel like after my two years of just… I don’t know what to call it. Personal trauma? One thing after another?… things are finally starting to give way, and I am re-discovering my writerly self. Working on these short stories has been tremendously helpful over the past several months. Now, I think, is finally the time to start working on a novel again. I was brave enough to file all of my old stuff into a couple file boxes and send it up to the attic. Continuously trying to work on the same bad ideas is not going to get me anywhere. I have to let go of the security of the old and get into something new that I am excited about. Working on the shorter length stuff really helped me get into a new mindset, and I feel like I am ready to go! Part of the epiphany I had over the weekend, which seems really obvious now, is that I have to start writing what I love again, and not worry about other people so much. “Other people” had me for the past few years, and I am so ready to be out of that mindset! I have my wonderful family and friends still here with me, supporting me and encouraging me. Every day it seems like i am meeting new people who make my world more complete (even when I feel like it IS complete!). I’m back to where I feel I belong. My incredibly weird, wonderful world. 🙂 The world of Mel. It’s so strange how one day you wake up, and the shroud of grief is gone. You are a different person because of it, but you realize you are no longer grieving. I can look back objectively now. It still feels sad, but I don’t feel defined by loss anymore :).
LOL most of you have no idea specifically what I am talking about, but that’s OK. We all lose stuff in like, people, status, homes, something. Sometimes it all happens at once and makes your head spin and you don’t even know who you are anymore! But it doesn’t last forever, it really doesn’t. Bide your time, and don’t make it worse by piling a guilt trip onto yourself. Crap happens, it happens to us all, and we just have to live through it. There is an end! Usually it is even in this lifetime! Happier days will come, and it all starts by appreciating what you DO have.
Anyway, enough with the motivational speaking. Let’s get to work!! I hope everyone has a good week!
PS-There may be some changes around here on the blog… I’m thinking of getting more organized, having more thematic posts that actually MEAN something, some more informative stuff (you know, like actual CONTENT!). I may dump some of the stuff in the archives, because honestly, who wants to read that crap? And I might go about redesigning some things. I change my blog theme for every story I work on; I need to find something more universally ME. Though I kind of like my eggs…